Why You Should Be Committed to Lifelong Dating After You’ve Found Your Life Partner

I think our perception on dating is shortsighted. When we speak of dating, most of the time we think of single people. But what about lifelong dating? What is that and why is it important?

Guys: do you remember what it was like to court your lady? What you did to get her to want to be in a relationship with you?

I know I do. And, I remember always wanting her time. I wanted nighttime dates, midday dates, and morning dates. All the time I could get, I wanted it because I didn’t want her spending time with anyone else…I wanted to prove to her that I was a good investment of her time.

In order to do this, I was creative. We walked the art district, to look at the various art galleries. We went to the zoo. I took her dancing. On one occasion, I even cut up little party sandwiches, bought plastic champagne flutes, a nice bottle of champagne, and took her to the beach for a picnic. I wanted to wow her with the variety of my dating, in order to keep her interested and engaged…to keep her wanting to go out with me.

I did all of this while I was a single dad, raising an 8-year old boy.

I’m sure you have a similar story, right? We all pull out all the stops when we find the woman we want in our lives, right? Right?

And it works! We convince this stranger to open herself up to us and engage with us. We compel her to spend time with us and share her life with us. Ultimately we gain her commitment to us.

But it all started with a date…it all started with dating.

 This is why you should be committed to lifelong dating.

Even once – especially once – you have “gotten the girl,” dating is still critical to keeping her. But once we’ve won her heart, it’s so easy for us to focus on other things: career, children, hobbies, friends, etc. And when our attention is diverted, the relationship gets stagnant. We might remain together…we might still love each other, but you know something’s missing.

And the “missing something” is that key ingredient that helps you to maintain joy and peace in your relationship. But, with a commitment to lifelong dating you are able to continuously renew that joy and peace. A commitment to lifelong dating helps you to create the atmosphere that will revive the level of intimacy you are able to have in your relationship.

You should want to master the art of lifelong dating

When you become committed to lifelong dating it will help you to open the lines of communication between you and your lady. It will help you to have fun together, and give you some joy to remember when times get tough. Lifelong dating will help you to replenish your love and create more love, in order to strengthen your relationship.

What is your story? Tell me the stops you pulled out when you found the woman you wanted in your life! What was it like? How did it make you feel?

Marriage: Sex, Obedience and Love in Salvation

If you are married or hope to be married this book is for you; if you’re preparing for marriage or tending to your marriage you will definitely want to read this text.

Marriage and Family LifeOn Marriage and Family Life is a collection of sermons by St. John Chrysostom on various biblical texts that teach about marriage and parenting. He speaks of marriage’s role in controlling lust: that sexual relations is more a reason for marriage than having children. He presents a very insightful viewpoint on the issue of wives submitting to their husbands, and husbands being the head of their wives. St. Chrysostom outlines what kind of bond marriage is, and what is meant by that bond. He then gives an explanation on the overall goal of marriage and provides guidance on how to choose a mate. He also teaches on parenting and what parenting teaches us about God and our relationship with God.

This text is my favorite work on marriage: what it is and how to fulfill its obligations. St. John was given the name Chrysostom (“golden tongued”) because of his way with words…he had the gift of gab, and could communicate difficult theological concepts in simple ways. This point is made clear by his explanation of marriage.

I enjoy how St. Chrysostom explains marriage and the relationship between husband and wife. He does it in a way that is true to the Gospel and uplifting to both men and women.

His arguments and positions are so compelling that women will gladly embrace the command to submit to their husbands (yes, I said gladly). And husbands will rethink their position on their “headship” over their wives. Overall, both husbands and wives will have a much better understanding of the mystery of marriage being an icon of Christ and the Church.

“Wives, be subject to your husbands as to the Lord,” has been a passage that has caused many arguments. So much so that pastors tend to gloss over that passage when doing marriage counseling. Or, pastors hold such misogynistic and chauvinistic views that a completely warped interpretation akin to slavery is passed on to couples. Yet, St. Chrysostom advises that husbands achieve the “subjection” of their wives “through affection, kindness, and…great regard…” For as he says, “…one’s partner for life, the mother of one’s children, the source of one’s every joy, should never be fettered with fear and threats, but with love and patience. What kind of marriage can there be when the wife is afraid of her husband?”

Here is a view of marriage to consider! And, if St. Chrysostom is right, here we find the key to rebuilding Society. What do you think? Marriage is a sacrament, and therefore bears witness to a deeper and mysterious grace. But, does marriage have that kind of world-changing/revolutionary power?

If you are in the Orlando area, join us for Bible Study on Thursdays at noon and 6:30 pm. Alternatively, our series on marriage will be made available in late February. In the meantime, check out St. John Chrysostom’s guide to a thriving relationship: On Marriage and Family Life.

The Gay Marriage Debate Resolved

This whole gay marriage, no gay marriage thing seems a constant debate.
So, I start thus: I am an Orthodox Christian who believes that marriage is a religious sacrament ordained by God, as a bond between a man and a woman. But, to those who support gay rights, don’t be turned off yet. And, to those who are against this initiative, don’t rest easy. I will not say what you think.
What is gay marriage?

In Christianity the bond of marriage is between one man and one woman. For other faiths, there may be an allowance for multiple wives. Yet, that bond is still between male and female. So, where does an Orthodox (and thus, conservative) Christian fall in this debate on the idea of gay marriage? On the side of religion of course. But, what does that mean?Many are up in arms about Proposition 8 in California. This ballot item was dubbed as an effort to “protect marriage.” The so-called “defense of marriage” has been a heated debate. Here’s a clip of the protests:

There is no reason for this argument. Marriage is a Sacrament of Religion…not of the State. If we truly want to “protect” marriage we would keep it out of the State and leave it in religion where it belongs. It is not homosexuality that is destroying marriage. It is the State, and the fact that we have abdicated that right to the State, that destroys marriage.

What is the solution in the debate on gay marriage? Abolish all marriage in the eyes of the State. Change everything to Civil Unions. There is the equality: heterosexuals would have Civil Unions and homosexuals would have Civil Unions. Transgenders would be entitled to Civil Unions.

Then leave marriage to the respective faiths. Let the individual religious sects and/or denominations decide who will and will not be granted a marriage. This way, everyone can enjoy Liberty – which is the promise of America, without violating any religious doctrine.

We do not need to be divided by this issue – regardless of our religious (or a religious) beliefs. We must allow people to respect religion, but we must also allow people to have no religion. If we disagree with their stance, we should pray for their hearts to be changed – not force them. But, that’s my opinion…what’s yours?

Share Your Thoughts!